Attorney Myers: My ex fiancée gave me a fairly expensive diamond ring when we got engaged. Things really did not work out and I broke it off. Now, he is demanding the ring back. What should I do?
Courts apply several different legal theories to such questions. The problem is that none of them fit perfectly.
A gift is irrevocable. If you give something to someone, you can't ask for it back.
Then again, a contract theory imposes an implied term that the giving of the ring is on condition of marriage. If the wedding doesn't happen, this view holds that the non-bride would be unjustly enriched if she kept the ring.
Some states go along with the gift theory. Barring unusual circumstances, the giving of the gift can't be revoked even if the marriage is called off. The exception is if the ring is a family heirloom. John gives Mary the same diamond ring that his great grandfather gave to his great grandmother. If that engagement is broken off, then John's family almost always gets the family treasure back.
New Hampshire courts nailed the issue years ago. In a real case, John gave Olga a diamond ring, as well as a dress, a pair of shoes, a purse and "miscellaneous toiletries and perfumes" when they got engaged. About two weeks later, Olga broke things off and decided to keep everything. John's claims to get everything back went all the way to the New Hampshire Supreme Court.
The court ruled that the groom should get the engagement ring back where the engagement was terminated by the no longer bride-to-be. That's the conditional contract theory. As to the dress and other gifts, the court held they were absolute gifts or "personal gratuities", upon which the law imposes no condition of return. The case, Gikas v. Nicholis, was decided in 1950 and is still good law today.
The Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court, facing similar facts, cited the New Hampshire case and ordered the return of a six carat ring in DeCicco v. Barker.
So, given the facts in the question, you'll likely have to return the ring.
However, in other cases it isn't always so simple.
Under a fault based analysis, the ring giver would get the ring back unless he called off the wedding. But, critics of this rule point out that no matter who finally broke off the engagement, the court should consider whose position was more justified leading up to the relationship's end. Unfortunately, that could turn a simple case for return of a ring into a knock-down, drag-out fight similar to a contested divorce, and the parties weren't even married.
One ring case was decided in Federal Court. The fault analysis was applied where hubby spent over $66,000 on a ring with funds he had defrauded from investors. The wife likely knew about it. Guess what? She had to give it back (S.E.C. v. George, 6th Circuit Ct. of Appeals, 2005).
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Andrew Myers of Derry has law offices in Derry and North Andover, Mass. He is a member of the American Association for Justice and the New Hampshire Trial Lawyers Association. Send questions to andrew@attorney-myers.com.
